Making Hubby #2

Originally posted on September 21, 2011

Since my last post detailing Jami Hovey's first lesson on Balance, I have been asked more than once how one successfully makes their husband number 2 in their life when there are so many responsibilities and distractions demanding our attention.  I don't claim to be an expert on the subject by any stretch of the imagination; however, I am going to post my thoughts here, and I want you to feel free to add comments as to how you personally give your husband proper place in your life.

First, you need to know a little background.  My husband and I have been married 31 years and have 4 grown children, 1 fantastic daughter-in-law and 1 perfect grandson.  During that 31 years, Stephen has traveled extensively 26 of those years and still does.  To give you a little perspective, our oldest "child" will be 28 tomorrow.  There have been many, many days that the only interaction I had with my husband was 15 to 30 minutes very late at night when he would call and we would discuss family and household business.  Both of us would be so very exhausted by this time, but I looked forward to it all day.

I think we often equate putting our spouse in a place of priority in our lives with spending a major amount of time with him.  Don't get me wrong.  We need to spend time with our husbands, but I contend making them number 2 is as much or more of an attitude issue as a scheduling issue.  Let me explain.  Remember when you first fell in love?  Whenever anything good or bad happened throughout the day, you just couldn't wait to share it with "him".  Right?  Do you still feel that way?  Remember how you would rather spend time with him than go out with "the girls"?  Do you feel that way now?  We must covet that relationship and make a direct effort on a daily basis to let him know that he is the most important person in our lives whether we get to spend just a few quality minutes with him or a few wonderful hours.

Here are a couple of ideas:

1. Remember to pray for him every day.  Don't hesitate to let him know that.  Let him know you are praying for a specific issue he is dealing with that day, etc.
2. Remember to pray with him.
3. Buy a dry erase marker and write "I love you" or "I respect the way you work so hard to provide for our family" or "Thank you for being such a wonderful dad to our children"  etc on the bathroom mirror.  Don't panic.  It will clean off!
4. Write him a love note and put it in his computer case, lunch box, wallet, etc. so he'll find it during the day.
5. Buy his favorite snack and have it sitting in the car for him to find when he leaves in the morning.
6. Text him a message during the day.
7. Look for ways to brag about him to your kids, friends, etc.  - especially in front of him!

You get the idea.  He needs to know you love, respect and  think he is a man above all men!  Yes, you have to make an effort to spend quality time with him, but you can do things in between during your busy days to let him know that he is number 2 in your book.  Use your imagination and your knowledge of what is important to him.

Oh, and by the way, I asked my husband this question before posting this.  You might be interested to know the male perspective in this household anyway was the same as mine!  Have a good day, ladies, and add your ideas of how you make your husband know he is number 2!

copy right by Robin Kelley

used with express permission